Thirty for 30
Random observations taken from my notes app.
It’s not like I have any particular wisdom to impart just because my twenties are over. 30 is still young and I am still very much a dum-dum, and this doesn't really have anything to do with the usual Buttered Popcorn content, but whatever. This is my newsletter and I do what I want. This is the most personal I’ll ever get on Substack lol
Over the past year, I’ve started to feel physical limitations on how much I can do in a given week before collapsing from exhaustion, and it’s very annoying.
It's spelled “bánh mi,” not “bahn,” and it drives me crazy when I see this misspelled.
Many of my friends who are well into their thirties are still flirty and thriving and party harder than my twentysomething friends, who say they are such grandmas now and they are so old: no you are not!
Christmas music should only be played in December.
The most successful musician alive today is José Feliciano, the man who wrote “Feliz Navidad” and is just chilling in Connecticut.
When musicians get famous they become less relatable, so they keep writing love songs, because that's the only part of their lives that remotely resembles ours.
Cultural events like concerts and movies shouldn’t start at 7 PM — there’s not enough time to eat before, and afterwards, the good restaurants are starting to close — 6 PM or 8 PM are the ideal times.
Cars should not have touch screens.
If I could have one superpower, it would be to never have to sleep because this is the main thing that prevents me from doing what I want to do on a given day. (To sleep, perchance to dream.)
The San Jose Sharks will win their first Stanley Cup in 2031.
Every fall, when it gets dark at 4:30 PM, it’s such a terrible surprise, and even though I know this happens every year, I never get used to it and it fucks me up every single time — I’ve been told that this is sorta what periods are like.
The fetish for durational cinema/theater/etc. (thinking about Satantango and Gatz) is simply a way to flaunt one’s devotion to the art; I’m guilty of this too.
Some things I wish I had done before turning 30: visit Asia (Vietnam and Japan specifically), go to the NY Transit Museum, seriously study French, listen more.
Some things I’m glad I never did before turning 30: go home too early, attempt standup comedy, heroin.
Some things I’m glad I did before turning 30: move to New York, moisterize, adopt a cat.
Some things I want to do, at least before I turn 31: more unstructured hangs, bike 100 miles, fix my sleep schedule (as if).
Concert venues and Broadway theaters should be segregated by height.
Sometimes the shot you shoot is a flaming arrow that burns a bridge.
The best pizza shop is the one that is open and closest to you; ditto for bagels, as long as they are not halal.
Gatekeeping is good, actually: museums get too crowded but art galleries, thanks to their confusing websites and impenetrable storefronts, remain blissfully devoid of the masses.
I really miss doing cocktail bar crawls, but once four drinks started to cost $100, I had to tap out.
Fine dining in Europe is way better than New York.
A day slips away from you; a week ago feels like forever ago; a month is over before you know it; each year is interminable.
To follow the dining scene in New York is to be in constant eulogy: remembering the places that have shut down (RIP Existing Conditions), as well as the places that have become so popular you can’t get in anymore, whether they are still great (L’Industrie) or have fallen off (Reception).
The south side of Prospect Park is better than the north side.
The most annoying neighborhoods in New York: Dimes Square, Williamsburg near the Bedford L, FiDi.
Sometimes I have nostalgia for my college years; at what point did we stop talking about our futures and become stuck in the present?
The following karaoke songs should be retired from rotation: Bohemian Rhapsody, I Want It That Way, Don’t Stop Believing, and Dancing Queen.
There are many interesting people I’ve been able to keep in my orbit, which is a blessing, but I wish I could be genuine friends with everyone I know, even though it is impossible, as it requires a level of emotional and temporal commitment that I cannot presently muster — but not everyone I meet wants to be friends with me, and that is okay too.
Closing on a mundane observation: Is there anything more perfect than being on a humble, unfurnished rooftop in Brooklyn, on a pleasant day, hanging out with your pals while the sun is setting?
